The Legend of Matt Holmes

We went to Seoul for the weekend to check out a lantern festival. It was a little overcrowded and pretty cheesy even for Korea, but we made the best of it. Matt Holmes as usual, turned an ordinary night into mayhem.

It all began at Oi bar in Hongdae. Hongdae is the University area of Seoul and Oi is one of those places that you gotta see at least once. Aestheticaly awesome, but lacking in other ways. Its more of a late night spot, but we were there early for the hooka. The DJ was blasting deafening sub-par dance music to an empty venue. Matt's hijinx started with some serious dancing. It should be noted that Mr. Holmes isn't a follower. He doesn't dance to make people laugh. He doesn't go with the flow. He doesn't adhere to social norms and personal space becomes a myth to him. To Matt Holmes, body moving is no joke.

Soon everyone had followed suit and everyone was shaking a leg. Perhaps i should preface this story with a quick rundown of another interesting night to give you a preview of what he is capable of. We had a night in Daegu that began on a bus at 10am with a few beers and ended at a Mcdonalds when breakfast was being served. I witnessed Matt rolling around on a slanted roof nearly falling 15 feet to the pavement, riding a stranger's bike, and grinding on every man, woman, and child at the club. After a few drinks, you can assume Matt is functioning on pure id.

(Back To Saturday)
1. He jumped into a moving car through the passanger window outside of the bar.
2. He noticed that he was sans phone and made a call to his cell from another line.
3. The driver answered as Matt handed the phone to his cabbie and they tracked the poor guy down.
4. He wasn't back for ten minutes before he was dancing on a 5 foot tall apple with door guys pleading for him to stop and trying to help him down.
5. I commented on a flyer and he decided to give it to me.
6. He had just pulled it down and handed it over in mint condition when a bouncer yanked it out of his hands and ripped it in half. His whole face was red and he was panting. So Mad.
7. We decided it was time to go.
8. I can't go into detail, but there was a bathroom incident with nudity involved
9. Matt dissapeared.
10. Everyone recieved a text at 11:24 a.m, the next day stating "Sorry everyone but its gunna b ok"

From what his girlfriend Emily can piece together, he dissapeared for a really long time, but they decided to wait it out for awhile at the hotel. Morning had come and he hadn't returned yet, so Emily decided to try to find him. Sure enough he was sleeping on the sidewalk outside the hotel.

This is a real man. This is his life. He doesn't kowtow to social constructions of whats wrong and right. He doesn't care about what your comfortable with. This is Matt Holmes. Take it or leave it.